It’s way late and I waited until the absolute last minute to pack (AGAIN) ( AS USUAL) and I am debating if I should take a little nap before I leave my house at 3 am to head to the airport or if I should stay awake.
I am headed to Haiti this time with my backpack full, but probably forgetting half of what I need. I have learned to pack light over the years. I remember the first international mission trip I went on, I packed enough for the whole country to survive that summer in my suitcase.
I really have no idea what is in store for this trip to Haiti. In fact, I just said yes to it last week when they called and asked me to go last minute.
Something I have learned about God…I want to always have my yes on the table. So that when I get the call for the crazy and the unexpected, or in my natural normal—I am saying YES to what God has planned for my days, and not sitting stuck to my own schedule.
I wanted to be a missionary from a very young age. I remember hearing about missionaries at church and deciding I wanted to be one. I also remembering making a salt map of Ghana, Africa when I was eight years old in Mission Friend’s class and sneaking and licking the salt later. Maybe that’s how my “call to missions” was burned on my heart.
I took my first overseas trip to Japan when I was a junior in college—and I was hooked.
I went to Nepal as a career missionary four years after graduating college. I will never forget those moments of leaving everyone and everything I knew and loved behind except the God who had promised to go behind and before me.
There were so many adventures. So many humbling moments. So many humoring moments. So much laughter, learning and tears. Being on mission with God is ALWAYS full.
I was under the impression that missionaries were super Christians. That once you signed up to serve you got your Jesus cape and you went in and saved the world, or at least the country you went to serve. So much of my pride and self-worth became wrapped up in that title—Missionary. I was one of “God’s elite”.
But where exactly was that cape I was looking for? Why was it I seemed to be more of a sinner then I thought I would be? Why was it some days I didn’t want to love the people I had come to serve one bit? Why was it that driving my scooter through town made me have road rage I didn’t even know existed as the 1,000th giant cow got in my way?
The Lord has revealed something to me. The minute I accepted Christ I became a missionary. My title didn’t start just when I got on a plane with my certificate from my missions board.
We are all on mission—to live alive in Christ and invite others to come alive in Him.
But I have had to slowly learn…my worth is NOT in my work for Christ.
My years on the mission field taught me, God does not need me, He WANTS me.
He does not need you, He wants you.
My worth and your worth, is in who we worship.
(stay tuned for part II about my recent trip to Post Earthquake Nepal and how it was life-changing to this girl)
Jenn Hand is a strong coffee drinking lover of Jesus. She has a zest for life and loves to go on adventure with Jesus around the world– often getting lost somewhere along the way. Jenn has been professionally speaking since 2004 and became the Executive Director and founder of Coming Alive Ministries in 2012. She spent two life changing years overseas in South Asia as a missionary and has traveled to many third world countries to share the love of Jesus. You can connect with her on her blog here.